By embracing the power of letting go, we powerfully open ourselves to a world of possibilities, growth, and genuine fulfilment
Published Date – 21 February 2024, 11:59 PM
By Viiveck Verma
We are never told to give up in life. In a world that massively celebrates perseverance and determination, the concept of giving up is typically seen in a compulsorily negative light. At times, defeat seems more acceptable than surrender, as perhaps trying and failing at something is seen as more respectable than plainly giving up. However, there exists an art to gracefully letting go, which is a skill that, when wielded wisely, can bring profound growth, peace and contentment.
Understanding the nuances of surrendering doesn’t imply weakness necessarily. It signifies the simultaneity of strength, wisdom and the ability to discern what serves us best. Let us delve into the multifaceted aspects of the art of giving up and how embracing it can lead to unexpected and extraordinary transformations.
Authentic Selves
At its core, consciously and vigilantly giving up involves releasing attachment to a particular outcome, belief, or situation and basing our self-worth on these things. It’s acknowledging that certain paths may not align with our true purpose or well-being. Contrary to popular belief, giving up doesn’t mean abandoning our goals or dreams altogether in an act of cowardice. Instead, it’s about reassessing our options and redirecting our efforts towards pursuits that are more aligned with our authentic selves. There are many stories that exemplify this. Let us think of Oprah Winfrey, the media mogul and philanthropist who has built a matchless legacy of her own. Winfrey daringly transitioned from traditional news reporting to a talk show format. She faced numerous obstacles and challenges before becoming the influential figure she is today but chose to give up the stereotypical anchor role to pursue a more authentic path, believing in the power of her own voice and experiences. This shift not only allowed her to connect with millions of people but also enabled her to create a unique and unparalleled platform that inspired positive change among her audience.
There’s a fine but significant line between healthy surrender and surrendering to defeat or giving up out of fear. Healthy surrender requires a strong degree of self-awareness and discernment. It involves recognising when perseverance transforms into stubbornness or heedlessness, or when a situation is beyond our control. Embracing this form of surrender allows us to conserve our energy for endeavours that truly matter.
Therefore, when discussing the concept of not giving up on time, it’s essential to navigate the nuanced territory between persistence and detrimental perseverance. While mindful persistence can lead to success, there are instances where persisting mindlessly beyond a certain point can result in adverse consequences, hindering personal growth and mental well-being, obstructing one’s path to fulfilment and in fact, enabling self-destructive behaviour.
Give up on Time
Individuals who militantly refuse to give up on endeavours that no longer serve their best interests might find themselves stuck in unfulfilling and oppressive situations. This could happen in interpersonal relationships, careers or personal goals that have ceased to align with their evolving aspirations and values. Persisting for the sake of it, in such situations might lead to prolonged dissatisfaction, emotional turmoil, and a sense of stagnation. Continuous pursuit without recognition of the need to reassess or recalibrate can also result in tremendous physical and mental exhaustion.
People who don’t give up on time often end up enduring stress, burnout and a decline in their overall well-being. Ignoring warning signs of excessive stress and continuing without respite can certainly have grave effects on health and mental resilience. Very importantly, whether it is holding onto outdated methodologies or clinging to a particular perspective, the refusal to pivot or adapt can lead to missed chances for personal evolution and learning.
For example, you have been trying to crack an examination you are not interested in studying for but are appearing repeatedly because everyone around you has reinforced the idea that it is the only way you will be successful and respected. Having internalised that judgement, you appear for the exam year after year and fail and after wasting several years on a goal you do not actually want to achieve, you may feel burdened by the repeated failure but also by the baggage of missed chances. Having ignored what your inner self was telling you, you may also have put yourself in a position where mental distress became a way of life. Such an occurrence is dreary but certainly not uncommon in today’s world. We are surrounded by a single-mindedly strident culture that looks at life from the binary of success and failure, making giving up equalise to running away from difficulty. However, it is incumbent upon us to resist such templates and fend for ourselves.
Self-compassion
Therefore, crucially, the art of giving up necessitates self-compassion. It’s acknowledging our limitations, understanding that mistakes are part of growth and treating ourselves with kindness throughout the process of continuous learning. Cultivating self-compassion enables us to navigate the complexities of surrender without harsh self-criticism which has the effect of committing endlessly to missions that bring us no joy. Self-criticism in such cases is judging ourselves too hard for not achieving things we did not want in the first place and there can be no greater act of spiritual self-harm. With a consequently embattled and battered self-esteem, success in life is likely to become a compulsive need and failure an unmitigated disaster. It is, therefore, an act of self-love to listen to yourself, assess if something makes you happy and take a step back when necessary.
Mastering the art of giving up is not about advocating for quitting at the first sign of difficulty. Rather, it is about discernment, flexibility, resilience and self-compassion. It is the art of understanding when to persist and when to gracefully release. Recognising the right time to give up requires self-awareness, adaptability and the willingness to embrace change for a more fulfilling journey through life. By embracing the power of letting go, we powerfully open ourselves to a world of possibilities, growth and genuine fulfilment. Go ahead, let go of what is not worth your time and make the most of the bountiful opportunities life brings to you!
Viiveck Verma is Founder & CEO, Upsurge Global, Advisor & Adjunct Professor, EThames College, and Strategic Advisor and Venture Partner, SilverNeedle Ventures
